8 Ways To Get Your Kids To Cooperate

Parents of kids at any age know what it’s like to deal with uncooperative child.

They don’t listen sometimes, forget what we even tell them, or blatantly refuse to do the things we ask. It can make you want to pull your hair out! Especially when you’re in a rush or tired, all you want is a cooperative child who doesn’t question you back.

Check out these 8 effective strategies to help encourage your child to cooperate:

1. Don’t Keep Repeating Yourself
   This is a mistake we all do, typically when we’re not getting the results we want. Most likely, your child heard you the first time and by repeating yourself, you train your child to stop listening and wait for you to get frustrated before they have to act. Instead, keep your cool and maintain clear boundaries. Once they have tested you in all the ways they can think of, they will find other areas of life more interesting.
2. Cooperate with Your Kids
   Sometimes kids need you to cooperate with them. If they are feeling hungry, sick, or tired, they may need extra help and a little understanding. Kids are far more willing to be cooperative when they know that you’ll provide extra support when they really need it.
3. Let Your Kiddo Have a Turn to Be in Charge
   Give each of your children a turn to be in charge. Put one child in charge of getting everyone ready and out the door and watch how quickly things get done. Praise them for doing such a good job and knowing what to do. They will take pride in their abilities!
4. Turn Things into a Game
   Kids love to play and when you make something fun, they’re more likely to get on board. When they don’t want to leave the park, make the trek back to the car into a race. Things don’t have to be a power struggle, and you can enjoy your time with your child much more this way.
5. Lead by Example
   Where do you think kids learn to be demanding and inflexible from? If we want our kids to cooperate, we have to be the bigger, more mature ones, and lead by example. Asking nicely, inviting, and working together to find a solution to a problem doesn’t teach to be more defiant or disobedient. On the contrary, by doing these things you’re laying a foundation of trust and teamwork that your kids will be able to rely on.
6. Test Your Kid’s Listening Skills
   Ask your child for something only once. If they don’t respond, be forgetful and invite them to remind you what you just said a moment ago. This allows your child to be the smarter one and if there’s one thing children love, it’s being smarter and more capable than adults.
7. Give a Note of Thanks
   Who doesn’t love being recognized for their efforts? Even small gestures of appreciation go a long way and that’s why we love “thank you” notes! Children thrive when they feel appreciated. It helps them feel connected to those around them. Let’s say your child has a hard time remembering to turn off lights in the house. Leave sticky notes on the light switches saying, “Thank you for turning off the lights when you leave the room.” It’s an encouraging reminder with no threat of punishment.
8. Communicate with “I Feel” Statements
   This is one of the easiest and quickest communication tools that will prevent your kids from getting defensive. Think about this situation – it’s been a long day and you told your child to put their shoes away and their school bag in its place, but by bedtime they still haven’t done what you’ve asked. Instead of jumping to yelling in frustration, shift your focus on how your child’s actions made you feel: “I feel disrespected when you leave your things in the middle of the floor. It would help me a lot if you put your things away when I ask.”

There you have it. 8 simple, straightforward, and effective strategies for steering your child away from battling and towards cooperation. Adding these suggestions to your parenting tool-kit will prepare you to tackle any cooperation struggles that may arise in the future.

You got this!